Mockery is the backbone of many popular TV series today, so much so that in many cases the audience tune in just to see the look on people’s faces when the anti-hero smartasses all over the scene (House MD anyone?). Sarcasm may be a bit over the top kind of humor, but it does provide the big bang audience oh so crave. Today, we’re going to list some of the most sarcastic people, funny characters in TV, who made sarcasm cool for the masses.
Along with the TV characters, we’re also going to list the most sarcastic standup comedians who have never let the social order disrupt their sense of humor. So without further ado, here are the masters of sarcasm-
The most sarcastic characters on TV and super sarcastic stand-up comedians- (in no specific order)
1. Dr. Gregory House (House MD)
When he’s not avoiding his clinical obligation, or buzzing on his beloved Vicodin, Gregory House rains sarcasm like a rain forest. He’s a genius at what he does and as a result, finds the normal cases boring. His world view seems cynical at the very best, and he constantly disobeys authority. He is a proper anti-hero material and he establishes that with his words that keep on ringing, long after they’ve been said. But despite all his efforts to look villainous, he still says things that make us wonder whether he’s on to the bigger picture, and we’re the one’s living it easy. Here are a few killer quotes from his medical kit-
“You talk to God, you’re religious; God talks to you, you’re psychotic.”
“There are three choices in this life: be good, get good, or give up.”
“It’s normal to be screwed up, but it’s really screwed up to romanticize it.”
“Love and happiness are nothing but distractions.”
2. Chandler Bing (F.R.I.E.N.D.S)
The funny man chandler from the classic “Friends” series might be the most lovable sarcastic person on this list due to his awkward and hilarious personality. Chandler is the shy guy who never gets the girl because of his uncontrollable urge to say something sarcastic in a tight situation, which talking to a girl is in his case. Other than that he doesn’t curb his urge to say something sarcastic in all his conversations with the other friends. He is the hardest on himself, never leaving a chance to go for his own insecurities. Many of the show’s most memorable scenes include him and Joey having a conversation about, anything really.
Here are some of his best one liners-
“I say more dumb stuff before 9 a.m. than most people say all day.”
“I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”
“I’m Chandler. I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable.”
“Until I was 25, I thought the only response to “I love you” was “Oh crap!”
3. Liz Lemon (30 Rock)
Liz lemon from 30 Rock is another great character that deserves a spot here. She tries her best to be a normal woman, but she’s just too awesome to be okay. Summed up by Jack on the show, as a “New York third-wave feminist, college-educated, single-and-pretending-to-be-happy-about-it, over-scheduled, undersexed, you buy any magazine that says ‘healthy body image’ on the cover and every two years you take up knitting for…a week”, she is trying to make it in a hard world.
Although good at her job which is writing, she shows very few skills and a very little interest for being socially accepted. She is superbly funny, and icon, and a people and critics choice, as is proved by the numerous awards Tina Fey who plays Liz, has won over the span of seven years. Here are few of the juiciest lemon quotes-
“If I can’t poop in the street, why should my tax dollar pay for someone else to?”
“You can try to change New York, but it’s like Jay Z says: concrete bunghole where dreams are made up, there is nothing you can do.”
“I pretty much just do what Oprah tells me to.”
“I hate January. It’s dark and freezing and everyone’s wearing bulky coats. You can do some serious subway flirting before you realize the guy is homeless.”
4. Charlie Harper (Two and a half men)
Charlie Harper’s name will stay forever engraved in the “Bad boy hall of fame” of Hollywood. Charlie likes to party, but there’s always Alan to bring his buzz down. Charlie, Alan, and little Jake make the half hour episode of two and a half men, a hilarious watch. Charlie’s crazy lifestyle and his drive for booze and pretty ladies make him a strange (to say the least) role model for little Jake. His behavior ranges from charming, witty, to downright sarcastic.
Here is some of his unforgettable quotes-
“When I say “I understand” it doesn’t mean I understand, it doesn’t mean I agree, it doesn’t even mean I’m listening. “
“My past is divided between the things I can’t remember, and the things I don’t want to.”
”For you I would go to the end of the Earth. Coming back is a different question.”
“I don’t have money for luxuries like eating out, or eating in, really. I’m trying to learn to chew my own cud.”
5. Sheldon Cooper (The Big Bang Theory)
The super smart astrophysicist from big bang theory makes in this list because of his quick and smart wit. He is strange case as he can throw sarcasm without knowing and has even harder time recognizing it when it comes his way. He is annoyingly lovable and we love to see him make smart comebacks. But he’s not that fun for his rommie Leonard or the other members of the gang.
Here are some of his analytical quotes–
“What’s going on is we’re about to go to prom and there’s a great deal of pressure on young couples like us to engage in what Mr. Bob Eubanks called “makin’ whoopee”.
“I know the real reason you never made progress with that idea. You thought of it on September 22nd 2007. Two days later, penny moved in and so much blood ushed to your genitals, your brain became a ghost town.”
“The correct animal for inter-species super soldiers is the Koala. You would wound up with army so cute, it couldn’t be attacked.”
“There’s no denying that I have feeling for you that can’t be explained in any other way. I briefly considered that I had a brain parasite, but that seems even more far-fetched. The only conclusion was love”
(Some of) The most sarcastic standup comedians- (in no specific order)
6. Bill Hicks
Known for his unique and electric performances, Bill Hicks was truly a great standup comedian, social critic, and a satirist. He lit his cigarette, and then he lit the stage on fire. He had his own brand of sarcasm that he used in his acts. His views on politics, drug culture society and many other issues made him a rock star amongst stand-ups. He was truly a master of the art. It’s a shame he got taken from the world too soon, like many other greats.
Here are a few quotes that you’ll find entertaining, to say the least-
“The American dream is a crock. Stop wanting everything. Everyone should wear jeans and have three T-shirts, eat rice and beans.”
“Women priests. Great, great. Now there’s priests of both sexes I don’t listen to.”
“It’s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s just hilarious.”
“People in the United Kingdom and outside the United States share my bemusement with the United States that America doesn’t share with itself.”
7. George Carlin
The American actor, author, social critic and standup comedian George Carlin was a fast paced, highly observational artist. Carlin is most known for his “Black comedy” involving views on politics, English language, psychology, religion, and various other taboo subjects. He was constantly improving and polishing his stuff and even in his last years his charisma only grew. He will be remembered fondly, all the more so for his sarcastic wits.
Here are some of his most iconic quotes-
“I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.”
“So I say, “Live and let live.” That’s my motto. “Live and let live.” Anyone who can’t go along with that, take him outside and shoot the motherfucker. It’s a simple philosophy, but it’s always worked in our family.”
“Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!”
“As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero, he no longer is.”
8. Rita Rudner
She is a writer, a comedian, and an actress. She can also be called the queen of deadpan comedy. Her sense of humor intelligent and she tells it with style. Her charm is not lost with years and she’s still at it at 63. She can also be called the sweet sarcastic lady who you cannot help but watch and watch. She talks mostly about relationships and she has written many plays, movie screenplays, and has acted in various cinematic productions as well. Her charming sense of humor and the fact that she was one of the earliest female standup comedian to rise from new-York makes her a must have on this list. Here is some of her charm for you-
“I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”
“Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.”
“I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.”
“I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don’t know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit; I’ll break up with someone on purpose.”
“A saleslady holds up an ugly dress and says, ‘This looks much better on.’ On what? On fire?”
9. Dave Chappelle
Dave chappelle has become a household name now with his great sense of humor and a long list of projects he’s been involved in ranging from standup routines, movies, and his own super hit television show, “The Dave Chappelle Show”. He represents the streets and addresses issues like racism, politics, drugs, and relationships. Dave chappelle is like a storm of funny that comes and destroys. He leaves you laughing and talking, long after you are done watching him. He is loved by his peers, critics, and the audience alike. Although he is surrounded by controversy every now and then, he always manages to get out stronger. Here is some of his best-
“You can’t get un-famous. You can get infamous, but you can’t get un-famous.”
“Like, see, I’d never vote for George Bush Junior, but I don’t know anything about his politics. All I know about that George Bush Junior is that that guy sniffed cocaine. That’s right. Now, listen, we can’t have that shit in the White House. That may be fine for a mayor; but goddammit, not the White House! The stakes are too high. He’d be sellin’ nuclear secrets for 20 or 30 dollars and shit.”
“They got a character on there named Oscar, they treat this guy like shit the entire show. They judge him right in his face, “Oscar you are so mean! Isn’t he kids?”, “Yeah Oscar! You’re a grouch!”, it’s like “BITCH! I
LIVE IN A FUCKING TRASHCAN!”
“Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it.”
10. Louis CK
Louis CK is one top notch sarcastic; kill you with his ranting humor comedian. He is hilarious for simply being, Louis CK. This actor, writer, producer, director, editor, and comedian loves doing what he does and you do too, if you’ve seen him. His routine covers observational, self-deprecating, dark and vulgar humor, which can be too much for some. He has touched a variety of issues ranging from politics, environmentalism, consumption, race, class, education and also, masturbation. He is not afraid to talk about things most people shy away from. He has an impressive body of work and even more impressive collection of quotes. Here are some for you-
“As humans, we waste the shit out of our words. It’s sad. We use words like “awesome” and “wonderful” like they’re candy. It was awesome? Really? It inspired awe? It was wonderful? Are you serious? It was full of wonder? You use the word “amazing” to describe a goddamn sandwich at Wendy’s. What’s going to happen on your wedding day, or when your first child is born? How will you describe it? You already wasted “amazing” on a fucking sandwich.”
“You’ve got to be optimistic to be single. Stupid. You have to be stupid. That’s what optimistic means, you know? It means stupid. An optimist is somebody who goes, “Hey, maybe something nice will happen.” Why the fuck would anything nice happen?”
“It seems like the better it gets, the more miserable people become. There’s never a technological advancement where people think, “Wow, we can finally do this!” And I think a lot of it has to do with advertising. Americans have it constantly drilled into our heads, every fucking day, that we deserve everything to be perfect all the time.”
“I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish – that’s what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff.”
That concludes our list for now. What do you think of the list? Have some more names that should be here? Tell us all in the comment section below. Don’t forget to share.